Confessions

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You

left a few unfinished poems

in that hidden book of yours

and you left those words hanging

by the other end of the rope

to which you hung yourself. 

You left them for me

to complete. 

But you never told me

the endings 

of those incomplete dreams

which you thought of writing, 

which you left unfinished. 

Now how am I 

to write those poems for you?

How do I write those dreams

that you saw?

How do I finish it

without dipping in it

the purple ink of my pen?

You were fire

but I am ice. 

And my poems

will never complete yours. 

And in my cold numbness

your fire dies silently. 

In my purple ink, 

your dreams get tainted. 

And today 

in that hidden book of yours

I confess

my incompleteness 

and imperfections. 

When you tied the knot around your neck, 

you forgot

that I was on the other end.

And then there were none

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Faith and hope are like thin fragile threads. Doubt and hurt are such intimate partners. And it is said that every relationship goes through a test of these at different points in life. She trusted in him, sure. But today, the extent of that trust was to be put to test. And the way in which things were going she was sure to fail the test miserably.

The station was filled with overwhelming emotions. Sorrowful goodbyes and cheerful warm welcomes contagiously interrupted the atmosphere. And she stood there. All her bags packed. No goodbyes said. Waiting and hoping that she will not have to regret her decision. She thought about the people back at home. Her father, her mother…

If the sorrow of her leaving did not kill them then the shame her loving relatives would subject them to will definitely do so. But this was something she had to do. She could not go through with the idea of self sacrifice and whatever it is that she was expected to do. Sure. She loved them. But this was too much of a price to ask to prove her love for her parents.

Leaving home was not easy. It was the most difficult decision she had to take, and it was the most painful one as well. She knew that this was the right thing to do. But now, as she stood in the station waiting, she was not sure about her decision anymore. Did she really do the right thing? She did not know. She saw a little girl, with her long hair pleated on both sides with a middle partition, walking towards a train with her father. She saw the way he was holding her hand. Gently. Possessively. It brought back so many memories of her father. The way he took care of her. The dreams he had for her. Tears threatened to break loose. And suddenly, as though to reflect her inner turmoil, the sky filled up with a melancholic hue. It was in doubt too.

As the big clock behind her ticked away the many hours, her faith and trust were starting to fade. She kept searching the crowd for a familiar face, for a familiar voice. She waited, for her faith to be restored. She checked the clock. 2.45. Their train was scheduled to arrive at 3’o’clock. But she could not board the train alone. Panic started clawing on her sadistically. There was no way she could go back home. And now, she had no place to go to. Ten more minutes, she thought to herself. If he did not come in ten minutes, she knew what she had to do. It was the only thing left for her to do.

5 more minutes…

As the hands of the clock neared 3, she heard the train howl from a distance. It was time. This was all that was left to do. An old song suddenly burst into her memory as she walked in the direction of the approaching train.

If you miss the train am on you will know that I am gone…

As she walked towards the edge of the platform, she heard a familiar voice call out.  

“Cut! Good shot!"

Identity

Those silent kisses you plant
On my forehead
So soft.
So gentle.
Today,
They have come to define me.
They have become my identity.  

Before Sunrise

A thousand promises made in a strange land.
A promise of good times

Of a memorable journey. 

Of good conversations 

And of coffee and beer and games.

A thousand promises made in a strange land. 

A thousand promises made

by a stranger to a stranger.
But my dear stranger
in those promises somewhere

we forgot to promise
to hold our breaths and

we forgot to lock away our hearts. 

A thousand promises we made

and we forgot the most important one.

And as the sky turns golden
ready to forget its yesterday

I stand in a street of a strange land

beholding every word that you say, 

surviving on the air that you breathe.
Tell me dear stranger

why did we make a thousand promises and forget to promise

to not fall, to not love? 

Tell me dear stranger

why did we lock lips and lose our hearts? 

Why did we become lovers from strangers

in this strange little land of love, 

if after sunrise, 

we were to board our trains

and turn strangers again?  

The Veiled Rebecca- Chapter 6 - Vivid. Again.

The veil.

My loyal,

dear dear friend. 

It said nothing 

to anyone. 

It hid all my different colours. 

The veil.                               

My dear, 

loyal friend. 

I hid beneath it

whenever

my heart beat too fast

or my cheeks colored too much. 

I hid beneath the veil 

whenever 

a word threatened to be uttered. 

I hid beneath it

whenever 

a tear left my heart. 

And the veil. 

My dear loyal friend. 

Revealed nothing to 

anyone. 

The veil. 

My dear dear friend. 

Seasons have changed. 

Many have come

many are gone. 

Many are yet to come.  

But the veil. 

My dear

loyal friend.

It saw my different colours

and it soaked in all my tears. 

It holds all my deepest wishes

and my darkest secrets. 

And it remains

the friend it was. 

My dear dear

friend. The veil. 

My dear, 

loyal friend.